I love how Bee Balm spreads, thrives in my climate, has a good medium sized height and blooms for a long time with many flowers However, it really does attract a lot of bees.

I have an area next to my patio where i'd like to put something like Bee Balm without as many bees since we eat out there.

I also am only considering plants native to North America (and the Midwest) since I like to provide habitat for local birds, insects and butterflies. That is more important to me than appearance.

I also really want something dense that will keep the weeds away.

Any suggestions?

you could try a cone flower or mum. Both will fill in more each year. Anything with a flower will attract bees. The bees are more interested in the flowers than you so you shouldn't have to worry much about them.

Ditto on don't worry about the bees.
I got stung this past summer when I brushed against a tall flower immediately after a rain storm, and that was a very unusual combination of events. Normally, I don't get stung, even when I "pet " the bees.

For weed prevention, try mulch.

For aggressive perennials, maybe ruellia brittonia, and rudbeckia Fulgida.

Also consider mountain mint.

This site might be helpful:
https://www.cleveland.com/metr...